Collecting Myself – Volume I


Back in the nineties I was inspired to write a concept album. I chose to do a real life subject, because that is the kind of stuff that I am normally interested in writing about. It came in a storm and I wrote 90 percent of it in about a two week period. I kept saying I was essentially done and could release it at anytime, but never have until now.

It is a concept album about my life from spring break of 85 to the summer of 88. Most do not know of what all that consists of, so here it is in a nutshell.

My dad died the first night of spring break in 85. At the time of his death I was trying to get laid by a girl I had, had a crush on for four years. My mother interrupted us in the heat of passion with the news that my dad had a heart attack and that we needed to go to the hospital. That girl never talked to me again after that night. I was fifteen at the time.

Upon returning to school the next week, a teacher took a jab at me and told me in front of the class that I would end up drunk and dead just like my father. I had always been a pain in her ass, so she took a chance to get back at me and crossed the line. I told no one about that because I knew the shit storm that would cause and I just did not have the energy to start a shit storm.

Around the time I was turning seventeen I met an older woman at a heavy metal club.  She was in the Army. I got her pregnant and married her. I spent my senior year with a wife, child and near a hundred thousand in debt with a new car and a four bedroom house. The only reason that I was able to attain such debt is because my wife was in the military and basically had a guaranteed job. My family was not crazy about all this to say the least. To be honest, neither was I.

To help support my family I took a job at a flooring factory from 4pm til 1am six days a week on top of my school.

I got divorced after high school for many reasons, but the catalyst for the actual divorce was my infidelity. My infidelity was in fact my plan at how to end the relationship, unwilling to man up and just say this isn’t working.

I was as honest as I could be in this book. I had no interest in painting myself into anything I wasn’t. I know my wife’s road was tough as hell, but I cannot give her side of the story. A lot of guts went into making sure this book was honest and didn’t make me out to be some hero stepping up to his responsibilities, but rather a boy who was lost, weak and let himself get deeper into things than he could handle.

The picture on the cover was taken a couple of months after my father died, and yes that is a mullet. I was graduating junior high and moving on to high school.

This book is available here and at my shows.

1/13 – 8PM – House show at Annie Street Arts Collective w/ Rotten Apple Gang
1/15 – 6:30-7:30  – Momo’s
1/29 – 8 – Close -w/ Jamie Marie and Ricky Stein – Flipnotics
2/18 – 8PM, w/ Mike Molaro & Jamie Marie – Cherrywood Coffee House

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